Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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