if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
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