If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
