ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
