Swine flu. Run for my life!
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
