It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
