I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
