You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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