But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Randomize
