i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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