sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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