could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
