That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
