We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
