Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Randomize
