help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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