Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
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