For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
of course. lets lasso hookers.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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