I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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