sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
