look no pants
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
why do cheetos always look like penises
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
