Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
