Non-Jews are for practice
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
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