I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
He shit in the fireplace
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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