Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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