I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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