I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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