You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
If I had your ass I would rule the world
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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