I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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