note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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