I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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