I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
