i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
