just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
