Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
