he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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