Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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