Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
i dont even know how to be here
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
