i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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