White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
this hospital has no fireball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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