He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
