Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize
