brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
