Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
