So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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