THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
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