STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
