Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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