Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(765): View more from Indiana

laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?

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(201): View more from New Jersey

One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo

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(248): View more from Michigan

don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?

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These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Read it at the TFLN blog
(641): View more from Iowa

Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.

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(605): View more from South Dakota

The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'

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(301): View more from Maryland

Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.

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(678): View more from Georgia

WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!

(404): View more from Georgia

The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night

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