Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
